The Gospel of Mark, chapter 8:34

Today’s gospel message from St. Mark, chapter eight, is about intimacy; the kind of intimacy the Lord wishes for us. This kind of intimacy is not superficial; it is real, and it demands sacrifices on our part.

How do you feel when someone you do not know well reaches out to hug you? Do you stiffen up and feel used emotionally? Many people do. How do you feel when a person you barely know calls you by your first name and talks as if he or she knew you well? Do you feel a little guarded? Many do. Many of us are cautious and reserved with people who come on too fast, like slick sales people, and approach us too quickly. We are rightly a reserved people, some of us more than others. We are sensitive about our relationships with other people, especially strangers. It should be no surprise if we bring these problems into our relationship with God. After all, Jesus invites us to share a relationship of intimacy with Him. Are we ready for this intimacy or a little afraid that He will want to be too close, too intimate, too friendly with us, and that it will involve too great a sacrifice for us.

Americans have always found intimacy difficult. Americans are an independent people who cherish their individuality and ability to stand alone. Television has enhanced that characteristic. Today, families spend hours each day watching the “tube” and less time than ever relating to one another in depth. Neighbors have less time for neighbors and cousins from across town seldom come to visit. Many people do not even eat their meals together because they are so occupied with their own separate needs.

Intimacy is built only in stages, step by step. It takes time well-spent trying to relate to real human beings. If we fail to learn the art of human intimacy, we will find intimacy with God almost impossible.

The marriage ceremony makes prominent mention in its ritual of good times and bad times, of sickness and of health. No relationship, even that of a man and woman in marriage, is without its pain. Growing in intimacy is more than having fun together, more than rushing from one excitement to another like Madame Bovary in Flaubert’s novel. Intimacy is the process of opening our souls to a significant other and, strengthened by that friendship, drawing strength within ourselves to grow spiritually. There is no greater intimacy than a relationship of friendship with the Son of God. Intimacy with Jesus requires pain and, without that salutary pain, intimacy with Jesus can never flower. That is why the Lord says: “If anyone wishes to come after me, He must deny his very self, take up his cross, and follow in my steps.”

May you learn to live in the sure friendship of the Lord.

Fr. Hugh Duffy.