1 Corinthians 13:5

It is almost a definition of a gentleman, to say he is one who never inflicts pain. The true gentleman carefully avoids whatever may cause a jar or a jolt in the minds of those with whom he is cast. He is tender towards the bashful, gentle towards the distant, and merciful towards the absurd.

He is seldom prominent in conversation, and never wearisome. He makes light of favors while he does them. He never speaks of himself except when compelled, never defends himself by a mere retort, he has no ears for slander or gossip. He is never mean or little in his disputes, never takes unfair advantage, never mistakes personalities or sharp sayings for arguments, or insinuates evil. From a long-sighted prudence, he observes the maxim of the ancient sage, that we should ever conduct ourselves towards our enemy as if he were one day to be
our friend.

He has too much good sense to be affronted at insults, he is too well employed to remember injuries. He is patient, forbearing, and resigned, on philosophical principles; he submits to pain, because it is inevitable, to bereavement, because it is irreparable, and to death, because it is his destiny. If he engages in controversy of any kind, his disciplined intellect preserves him from the blundering discourtesy of better, though less educated minds; who, like blunt weapons, tear and hack instead of cutting clean, who mistake the point in argument, waste their strength on trifles, misconceive their adversary, and leave the question more involved than they find it.

He may be right or wrong in his opinion, but he is too clear-headed to be unjust; he is as simple as he is forcible; and as brief as he is decisive.

John Henry, Cardinal Newman

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