They say: “You can choose your friends but not your Family.”

Family is of the utmost importance in our lives. Without a family to belong to, people would be rootless. They would be like ships without a rudder, especially during the formative years of childhood. The Son of God belonged to a family, a poor migrant family which had to flee from Bethlehem to Egypt to escape Herod and later to Nazareth to escape Archelaus (Matthew 2:13–23). But, it was within such a migrant family that Our Savior was born, nurtured and protected as He matured in wisdom and grace during childhood.

Immigration is on the minds of many people today. While it is necessary to have rules of immigration in any country, it is also important to respect the rights of migrant families who are caught up, through no fault of their own, in this terrible problem of mass migration. The bonds that unite migrant families are just as precious and are in need of as much protection as the bonds that unite any family today.

Family extends, not only to our blood relatives, but to all members of the human race. Jesus was addressing the crowds when someone said: “Your mother and your brother are standing out there and they wish to speak to you” (Matthew 12:47), In the culture of the East, as in Latin cultures today, the term brothers is often used of cousins, and not necessarily of blood brothers of the same household. Jesus replied to the question by asking: “Who is my mother? Who are my brothers?” Then, pointing to his disciples, He said: “There are my mother and my brothers. Whoever does the will of my heavenly father is brother and sister and mother to me.” In other words, if you want to be a really good mother, father, brother or sister, treat everyone as a child of God with love and respect.

Ties of faith penetrate a person’s being more deeply than ties of blood. The mother of Jesus was chosen to be the bearer of her Son, in the flesh, because of her deep faith, expressed in her words: “Thy will be done.” A family whose relationships are grounded in faith and love of the Lord, and whose actions are guided by sound moral and spiritual values, will be a strong family because those relationships will withstand the seductions of the world, and the all too human expressions of selfishness that drive families apart rather than pull them together.

Why do we have so many broken families in today’s society? Why are there so many divorces? And, why are there so many abandoned and abused children wandering our streets? It appears that the social media and the new forms of virtual reality young people are being sucked into today are driving them apart rather than bringing them together. Family ties are not fostered by these mechanical and virtual means. They are helpful up to a point to connect people over large distances, but they are not enough to bind or bring people closely together.

We need something better than artificial means to create togetherness. We need something deep and penetrating, something the Lord describes as doing the will of his Heavenly Father.

The disciples of Jesus were bound together by the spiritual ties of faith. With the exception of St. John, and St. Paul, they all had wives and, most likely, children. Yet, it was their trust in the Lord that enabled them to endure the course, in spite of the persecution and opposition of a pagan society.

Their ties of faith, hope, and love to Christ who is the Way, the Truth, and the Life was so real they could be of one mind and one spirit in their love for one another.

That was true family.

And, that is the kind of family we all need to foster.

—Fr. Hugh Duffy